The Mutual Admiration Society

In everyone's life, there are people that you're kind of obligated to be nice to - because you work with them, because you're related to them, because you live with them. To some, I am one of those people.

I have several people in my life, both family and acquaintances, that I *really* like and admire. They are cool, fun, amazing people that have done some pretty unique things. I enjoy spending time with them, and hanging out.....but at times, I get the feeling that it isn't mutual. Not that they DIS-like me - they just don't think of me. For Christmas or other special occasions, usually yes, but when it comes to what to do on Saturday night, or who to call when they want to talk - it isn't me.

In some ways, this isolation is my own doing. I move around a lot. I left the state for five years. I'm terrible about returning phone calls or listening to my voice mail. I do have friends that I hang out with regularly, but I'm really wanting to expand my circle of friends - and even my current friends tend to hang out with me one-on-one, so I'm not meeting anyone new through them. It seems like most of the people I know live thousands of miles away, so I spend too much time in front of a monitor instead of sharing time with people in real life.

So I've started trying to break out a bit - asking people to do things, going to more events out of my comfort zone, and find ways to be more active. I need to initiate a little more with some of these folks, and see if this feeling of rejection is intentional or one of benign neglect. Several people have mentioned things they'd LIKE to do with me - we just never do. Maybe I need to put those "we should do lunch" folks to the test.

I can't change how other people feel.....but I can at least change how I participate in this play. And maybe I'll find out we *do* belong to the mutual admiration society. Or I'll find someone who does.

--BT